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Losing Streakers
Losing Streakers is the 1st episode of Season 4 and the 31st episode of Dick Figures. Plot A gambling roadtrip to win rent money turns into a wild, winner-takes-all night of drunken, pooping, streaking buffoonery. Transcript (Red is driving alone in a car and excited.) Red: Sal Sagev! Whoo! (Looks up.) ''How you doing up there? ''(Blue is tied up on top of the car, screaming and struggling.) Blue: I don't want to go you asshole! Red: Rap city! (The car passes a sign into Sal Segav. ''Under it, a woman 'has sex with a man just before another man shoots him to take his place with the same woman. Next scene shows that three people were road-killed by the car before it crashes into a lamppost with Red and Blue completely unharmed in front of a casino.)'' Blue: Dude, we have ten bucks and rent is a thousand! There's no way we'll get it all here! Red: Blah blah blah. Shut yer face! Let's do it! (He cartwheels away at the same time leaving a cloud of his fart, which Blue gags on.) Whoo! (Red rushes up to the yellow employee at a roulette table to gamble their last ten dollars) Red: Put it all on red, big fart! (Blue tries to stop Red.) Blue: Don't listen to him he doesn't represent me. Red:'' (Red pushing Blue away) Don't listen to him he's a big piece of shit. ''(The table spins and the ball lands on number 35 in the black section.) Yellow Employee:'' (Deep dimonic voice with flames in the background.) House Wins! Red: Beep boop boop we're fucked. ''(Blue is enraged.) Blue: That was our last ten dollars! Red: Hey can I borrow ten dollars? Blue: Are you even listening to me!?! Red: Hey can I borrow twenty dollars? Blue: You're ruining my life!! (Red is suddenly surrounded by three women and holding a bottle of vodka) Red: I'm gonna go ruin my liver. See you in the hospital fat ass. (Red is then carried away by the three women) One of the three women: So sticky. (The women bring Red to another game with two posh women and a man along with a grey employee.) Grey Employee: Ahh sir, do you know how to play Craps? Red: (Red jumps on the table then squats.) ''I play every day. ''(The posh man and woman along with the Grey Employee watch as Red takes a shit on the table.) ''Craps is the shiiiiit! ''(Red starts making fart sounds as the smiles on the three slowly turn into frightened looks. Shit splats in their faces.) Posh Man: My wor...(Red then shits in the man's mouth as he speaks and on the eye where his monocle once was.) (Red heads to the bartender.) Red: Yo barkeep! give me a-- (Shows Lord Tourettes watching a stripper.) Lord Tourettes: 'RED HEADED SLUT! '''Yo, Freckle, put that twenty up in your- ''(Shows Red with a bottle forcing Blue to drink it as Blue is held down by two girls.) Red: Pussy! Drink that juice down. Blue: This is gasoline you-- (Shows Mr. Dingleberry in his car.) Mr. Dingleberry: Asshole! Get out of the road! (Red is shown running across the street with his dick out, but it is censored with a black rectangle.) Red: Whoow! I'm sexy and I know it! Mr. Dingleberry: Eeeehhh. That man has a humungous-- (Two women are shown back at the casino.) Orange Woman: (masculine tone) BALL SACK. Purple Woman: What? Orange Woman: That's what I said. I never actually seen a guy's (masculine tone) ''BALL SACK. Purple Woman: It's no big deal. It just looks like a ''(masculine tone) ''BALL SACK. ''(Red approaches a slot machine drunk with a drink. Blue approaches as well.) Blue: Dude, I think the cops are coming! Red: (singing) ''Whatdya gonna do? Whadya gonna do when they come for you? Ghost Busters! (''puts the glass to the slot machine) Hey robodick! Give me my money back! Blue: It's a slot machine, retard. It's not gonna talk back. (The Auto-Tuned Bee appears and flies into Red's mouth, who gags.) Red: (Auto-Tuned) ''That's more like it. Hey robocock, give me my motherfucking money back. Slot Machine: ''(robotic voice) Hey there, Red. Long time no see. Red: (Auto-Tuned) Hey, machine friend. How's yo mama? Slot Machine: She's been sad since you left her high and dry... Father. Red: (Auto-Tuned) ''Zero. Wha...ha...ha...hat? Slot Machine: Oh, why did you up and leave us, Daddy? Red: ''(Auto-Tuned) Shh...shh...shh...shhhhh.'' ''Papa couldn't pay for child support. Slot Machine: Nooooooooooooo. Red: ''(Auto-Tuned) ''I remember when you were just a little tamagotchi. ''(Vomits onto ''the' slot machine as it shoots out money.)' Blue: Oh, fuck, we are rich! ''(Red lies past out on the machine with crossed eyes as a pair of 8-bit sunglasses descend over Red's eye while "Bath Rhymes" plays. "JUST DEAL WITH IT" appears under Red and the music stops.) (Time lapse. Red and Blue are driving away with their money.) Blue: That was horrible. (Falls back on his seat) ''Let's never do that again. Red: ''(normal voice) You're right. We're never going to Sal Sagev again. (Stares out ahead.) VIVA LAS VEGAS! (Blue screams as they pass the sign into Las Vegas where another man and woman are having sex.) -Episode ends- Masculine Voice: (off-screen) BALL SACK. Dick Figures Title Same as the first episode of the first season A Bee or Something. May have been on a deadline or could not think of an idea for the title. Trivia *First time red displayed his penis, censored. *The second episode to show someone actually having real sex. First time was in We're Cops! with Red and the female cop at the end. *Sal Sagev Adaven is backwards for Las Vegas Nevada. *Lord Tourettes seems to like to spend his time at strip bars, like he did on We're Cops! *After Blue says to Red that the cops were coming, Red drunkenly sings part of a song called "Bad Boys" by Inner Circle. *Red mixes up the songs for Bad Boys and Ghost Busters. *This is The Bee's 5th appearance. *The Bee flies into Red's throat again giving him the auto-tune voice. *The slot machine sounds similar to the aliens in Planet Asshole. *The auto-tune voice seems to grant a person the ability to communicate with machines. *This is Red's second time getting drunk on camera. *Red referenced the song "I'm Sexy and I know it" by LMFAO when he was running aroung naked (clue: black rectangle). *This is the second episode, since A Bee or Something to feature the text at the end sequence without changed "I"s. *This shows that Red fucked a machine and the slot machine was his son. *It was possible to see this episode before it was officially released on April 5th. Making the second to do this, the first being Modern Flame War 3 *Some parts show that they're finishing each other's sentences. Recurring Gags Auto-tune Use *Red swallows the bee and begins talking to the slot machine. Floating Red *none Episode Ending *Normal letter I's The Last Line Being Cut *none Gallery Loser streak1.jpg Loser streak.jpg Loser streak2.jpg Loser streak3.jpg Loser streak34.jpg Loser streak4.jpg Loser streak5.jpg Loser streak6.jpg Loser streak8.jpg Loser streak7.jpg Loser streak9.jpg Loser streak10.jpg Loser streak11.jpg Loser streak33.jpg Loser streak32.jpg Loser streak14.jpg Loser streak13.jpg Loser streak12.jpg Loser streak15.jpg Loser streak16.jpg Loser streak17.jpg Magenta and Peach BALLSACK.png Loser streak19.jpg Loser streak18.jpg Loser streak20.jpg Loser streak21.jpg Loser streak22.jpg Loser streak23.jpg Loser streak24.jpg Loser streak25.jpg Loser streak26.jpg Loser streak27.jpg Loser streak28.jpg Loser streak29.jpg Loser streak30.jpg Loser streak31.jpg Videos thumb|left|300px Category:Episodes Category:Season 4